Welcome back to the podcast. So today I'm very excited to share with you a tutor who's going to be talking to us about trauma. And you may be listening and going like, Ah, this episode is not for me, but I really encourage you to move on because we're gonna be discussing all forms and types of trauma and abuse is really going to be able to share with that how it's impacting our stress and anxiety. First of all, thank you so much for being here and welcome to the balanced code podcast. Thank you. Thank you for having me. I'm excited to be here. When you share a little bit about what you do where you are in the world and how you serve people. I am in Maryland area USA and I'm a shaman transformational healer. Spiritual Guide. I got a lot of titles, bestselling author, artist, poet, but mainly what it comes down to I think those are all coming together into one form of the work I do, which is to help people heal their past guide them to heal their past and move from that place of trauma that's holding them that's running their lives and they don't know really, and to let go of those fears that they have and to start really trusting in life and going with the flow of life. And seeing all the love and beauty that's around them and connecting to that so that they can live a more peaceful joyful life from the inside. No matter what's going on on the outside. On the inside. You have peace of joy and love and you can go to any situation. And I think that's so important today that we realize all of this needs to come from the inside and not seeking it externally. Especially when the craziness of the world. It will make it crazy on the inside too. Right so really doing the internal work. Now for our listeners, how do you define trauma? I define trauma as any point in your life where there was an emotional trigger that left an imprint in your behavior palettes meaning something happened. It doesn't need to be big or small. It's just whatever left an imprint and you there from that point. You started changing your behavior. You started changing your patterns. And those triggers are still going to show today. Yeah, so that's how I defined the child. And we know that the first six to seven years of our lives tend to be the most impactful. But you know, and I know in the work that you do, you've seen this too. There can be things that happened in your teenage years, that and even young adult years that shape and impact exactly what you said. Change your habits, change your behaviors change your beliefs. Well, let's dive in then into how the unresolved trauma the things we really not based on emotional baggage that mental baggage, how does it show up in the anxiety we're experiencing in our lives? It shows up as trigger points and it shows up in how you are sort of living the life and you've turned off sort of to the inside. So for example, if you're going through life and you are not even noticing that you have these sort of rulebooks you have these sort of it's not OCD behavior, but you do things a certain way. Things have to be a certain way. And that's all for your sake. So anytime this sort of bubble that you've created for yourself, anything that touches this bubble, or anything tries to break this bubble, you start getting anxiety, you start getting fearful, you know, anger may come out, and that's those are the areas that you're not even noticing that you've developed something really simple as your morning routine that you have built. You know, it's not OCD, but you have that routine in place for a reason. And once something touches that routine, then you start to get anxious and start to get angry. So that's how you're not. You may or may not see anxiety popping up and then there's like general bigger anxieties about you know, your financial situation, relationship situations, work everything like that, that is told you notice easily but also those things are related to those smaller ones that you're not noticing. So our anxiety is almost like the red flags that they're like up something here. Something big or little that it's something. Exactly. And when you go start to go in there and look at things you'll see that everything we have, again, going back to those agents that you mentioned, things started in early life for whatever reason, and it's not to blame. That's why we came here. We came in its physical form, so exterior, so I have these emotions. So those emotions, then it's not a bad thing to have fear and anxiety, but it's stopping you from living life. So once you start removing those triggers, finding out where they started, and it's not. Sometimes when we go to therapy, you know, mentally we've sort of come to terms with those things that happened in the past. But those energetical emotional infants are still in the what I call the dumb little kid in there. Those are the ones that are causing the habit. So mentally you come as an adult, you're like yeah, you know, everybody had that situation or that was normal back then. Or it's okay, I forgive them. But really that energetical emotional place is where I go to take those out and heal though. You know, I think a lot of people when they hear us talk about healing and you know, even being a shaman, they think, Oh, this is whoa or new agey, but they don't realize there's a lot of science behind epigenetics and obviously mental health and mental wellness is a really what you're drawing the light is that our brain store thing, not just memories with the actual play by play, but the emotional experience around that right. The hippocampus holds on to that. And what you do is help people to bring that out. So if you're listening and you're like, Oh, this is a little bit about my head. No, actually, scientifically, how it happens. We just all have different vocabulary for how we talk about this. How do you work with people who maybe don't like the emotion and want to feel that right because it protected themselves by staying in their mind. So the first session, usually people come to me because they're like okay, I've tried everything else. I've tried therapy. I've tried this. I've tried it, nothing's working. And, you know, by now I have a pretty good reputation out there. Big good reputation. As you know, I've helped a lot of people. So they see that they're like they come to me, it's like, Okay, I've tried everything else. I've sort of given up what can you do for me? And that's where the first session is for me. You know, getting them to see what I see. And that's where I connect with them on the energetic level. And I actually go pick out those ages. I tell them okay, this is how you're going through life right now. This most of it came and the body is communicating with me it's not a me like energy. It's all energy beings, energy forms. And that's how we communicate. And I figured out you know, if it's painful with them, Mom side dad side, and even the ages I go pick out the agent that we need to talk to him when I give them the ages usually that's what or even the whole thing. They're like, yeah, that's That's exactly right. At that age. This happened at that age, this app is so Okay, now there would also say pay. Now I have to connect you to those things. And I tell them, you know, it's their journey. It's their lives. They have a choice to keep those things packed in a box. And anytime it starts to pop out, go like No, no, no, go back in there. Or they can bring it out deal with it. And not have to keep worrying about those boxes that they're storing and taking up space. Get them out. Let's clean this but it's their choice. I always say I'm the guy I'm going to help you. But I'm not going to work. I'm going to hold your hand and deep emotions come off. I'm going to give you the tools that you need. That is going to help you not just add we're going through this. But later on when you're not working with me and those things come up so you can handle it as well. So that's, you know, and usually they're most people. They're right on board with me and they're like, Yeah, okay, let's go do this. Yeah, because at that point, they're believers. They're like, okay, yeah, no, you're You know what you're doing? And like you said, they've tried so many other things. If we keep, you know, hitting our heads up against a wall and and thinking we're gonna do right, like that's not gonna work so it's worth trying out new methods. If traditional therapy didn't work for you if coaching didn't work for you, if you know whatever work you've tried reading the books, doing the podcast, all the workbooks, all the things. So, let's get back into our bodies and how the, I guess the unresolved traumas that from our past show us in our bodies, what are some of the symptom ologies that you see happening? Any of those illnesses that you write down or having those pains and aches and some of them are explained like, you know, high blood pressure, eczema, all those things. And some, you know, you go to the doctor, doctors, like I have no clue why you're experiencing that, you know, take the pills and that's built up all related to emotional and I, myself, you know, I had all these symptoms, I had endometriosis, I have variances I was in from the age of like, 16 I say used to say, you know, I had rheumatoid arthritis and even at that young age, I was like, No, I don't I know what I you know, this is not because of all that pain and fear that I'm holding on to and at some point I don't know about like, probably 20 years ago now. I was so bad. That I was having those Betty's patch patches for arthritis that I would have around every finger from like up through my elbows. It was like these white patches just for the pain so I could go to sleep. And I don't have any of those anymore. I don't have any of those things that they told me. I never carried it. I never believed in it because my internal system always told me do something else. So also illnesses, they have their roots into something even if it was coming from you say well it runs in my family. Exactly. That trauma runs into your family and as gets passed down to you. Yeah, I find my clients who talk about like certain areas of the body, that ache on receipt, or I always have to stretch I always feel like I need to stretch and with that something's stored and stuck there. And then when you move it wonderful, like stretch, great, but you also need to emotionally deal with there. And that's when they're like, emotion, right? Like no, we need to expect that. Well as we're a podcast that talks about life balance. Let's talk about stress, and overwhelm and burnout. That is one of our favorite topics here. unresolved trauma, obviously it leads us to having higher levels of anxiety. What about being more susceptible to stress and overwhelm? What do you see especially in our society right now that's quite a lot of different traumas on the collective wedding thing happened to our stress levels. Definitely Everyone is running on high emotion right now. And again, going back to the our energetic Colby. You are going to pick up on it. You mental actives, they have no way of hiding from those things. As a collective we are going to experience that. But again, if you find that space of joy and peace and love in your heart no matter what's going on, on the outside, you always have that space inside that you know, it's sort of guiding you through life and you're moving through these things in a much easier and less stressful ways. And the more you connect with that you're gonna have that peace. And even better, you get to change that energy out there, the more of us that shift. Again, that collective is going to shift what's happening on the outside as well. So there's a lot of things you can do for yourself. I mean, at some point you got to unpack those emotions and deal with it and see it but different forms of meditation different daily things that you can do for yourself, love and gratitude. For example, not just loving gratitude for like big things in your life. But everything that's around you, the air, you're breathing, sunshine, you know, somebody's opening a door for you. Somebody's smiling, get to all those things can be a source of love and gratitude. Absolutely. When you were talking about like we will feel what's going on the client I like to think of it as like, when you're at the grocery store in line and if there's a lot of people who are grumpy or it's like 530 and I need to get home and I'm stuck in this line. Feel the energy of everybody impatient. And if you just come in with a little more smile and a little more, you know, gratitude to the cashier or things like that it can shift how other people feel he's not one personally like smell back. Now I live in Germany. That doesn't always happen. People don't always smell back to try right you can mile and hopefully the mirror neurons go Oh, I smell back. That can shift things if you're listening to this and you're like, Okay, so I'm feeling the energy of everything going around and feeling all of their emotions. How do I change that so I stopped taking on their stress to it isn't how you respond like you said that internal peace and happiness and just a sense of can impact the people around you. What are some tools like to give your clients on really like releasing the emotions and stress of others around them? Because we do kind of sponge those up? It is definitely in the morning as you wake up. Try to sort of start your day with love and gratitude start your day with going inside and finding that space in you. So you got to put that time in for me for example, I have my morning routine. Everybody knows it's my morning coffee. I even like I wake up really early. And I like that darkness in the morning actually during especially like winter months. I don't turn on any lights. I mean, I'm going to the dark and I'm seeing it it's just you know your eyes get used to it and maybe when I need something just a little bit of the phone line. But that is my quiet space where I go and I sit and I start my day that way with like, as I'm seeing the sun come up or you know even today this morning there was mood and the sun together. I'm sad I'm so grateful for this. And I sit there that's how I start my day because that says how I experienced the day until morning and at night. Definitely have some time for yourself that you connect inside. And you find that piece inside. And then from there, it's just whatever we said. When something comes up instead of eating it. Come back to that place. You always have that place inside. You said the grocery line you know you're driving there's traffic gotta get someplace, pay couple of mindful breaths is going to come take you back inside your breath and your heartbeat, those two first thing that's gonna you connect with and it reminds you everything's gonna be fine. Switch your hand even on your heart if you have that always because over here, you're gonna feel the chest rising. You're gonna feel that breath, you're gonna feel the heartbeat you're gonna connect inside. And again, appreciation put every small thing around you that you see really being grateful for it really appreciated it. And you know, if you're no you're gonna go into a certain place that is going to be really a stressful environment. For example, you know, over here generally doesn't have Pasco I don't know but here Costco everybody's like oh my god I just found my post because did you know you're gonna go hospital just imagine this sort of like a light bubble around your what I call you put on this setup, invisible suit, you know, and just feel that around you and then go in you're gonna see a little bit of a difference. So those are all the tools I give my clients. I love that and I like your your suit, your energetic. Wonderful. So for those who are going okay, so this is ringing true, and I'm realizing that I never thought I had trauma, right? It goes to some belly off and now I see the things are definitely like maybe being bullied at school. Or I find sometimes like I love my brother and he's listening. Hi. He probably build some resentment towards me as the older sister who got certain things that he didn't get. And so there's that that all creates trauma and that doesn't mean something super bad happen. So if somebody is like listening to them going like I can see these things occurred to me a coach said this that hurt my feelings a teacher scolded me in front of the class and it stuck with me forever. Now my boss is scared of them. What do they do next? What's the next step once they realize, oh, wow, I do have something still there that I would call probably a trauma definitely start with those triggers. awareness, awareness of all those triggers. That's the first step. I actually wrote a book that I go over the steps and for anybody out there in Germany, I cannot give you any copies. Amazon doesn't love me. But if you go on Amazon, you can't get the digital copy or the physical book, but awareness. You got to become aware of your triggers emotions when they're coming up. And then as they come up and you see them sort of create the awareness creates that space because now you see it is not sort of stuck in deal and running the show. You're like okay, now I see it. And everything on the outside is there to show you those things. For you to be able to release it your relationships, your work, the stranger all those things are there is place for you to see all of that. So awareness is the first step and then once you become aware of it, then you have a choice. To tell yourself, it is all with a choice. There is a there's no right or wrong choice is whatever you are able to do it as long as you want to continue on that same place. It's okay. It's your choice. At some point you're going to keep because the awareness doesn't let you keep making that choice anymore. Now, you became aware so it's there, you can't hide anymore. And whenever you make that choice is going to say so we're choosing this again. Okay, let's go try that again. And at some point, you're like, Okay, no, I don't want this choice. I had pizza today. I had pizza yesterday. I had pizza for like a whole month. I don't want pizza anymore. I want something else. So that's a simple is it is awareness taking responsibility, because it is this responsible for your life. And that's why when my clients come to me the first thing I said, I'm just your guy, even if you give them the whole I'm not going to come up with yours. I'm gonna give you I'm going to tell you I'm here. I'm going to tell you I have your bag. I'm going to support you, I love you. And I'm going to give you the tools that you need to come out of the hole but I'm not going to get in the hole with you because that's your choice. And it's okay. There's nothing wrong with it. If that's what you're choosing it as your life. You are here to experience life the way you want to choose to experience it. So you want to eat that pizza every month. I mean, okay, there you go. Yeah, but hopefully you choose something. What is the name of your book in case somebody is looking and they want to immediately jump in and find this is called Change yourself, change the world. actually hear the copy. If you see it is really bright so you won't miss it. The subtitle is transform your life. Transform Your Life from fear based living to choosing love and seeing magic. Yeah, I'll make sure that the link to that is in the show notes below. Any last words you have for our listeners who are really starting to go Okay, I'm ready to get out of that hole. And I'm seeing that there's some things in there in my awareness now that kind of scare me or make me uncomfortable. What are some tips or support you'd like to offer people is more love around you that you realize, really, I mean, if you open yourself the reason you're not realizing about everything around you is because of those walls, those protections that you've created around yourself. And as soon as you start opening up just a little bit even as soon as you start realizing and appreciating those things a little bit. You will see just the abundance of love and support around you coming from places you didn't even realize or know about and there's so many different ways and messages are going to come to you guidance is going to come to you they're going to the path is going to come clear to you. You just have to be willing to take that step and be open and receive it because if you're close and if you're trying to protect yourself like this, or you know your hands are like this, you can never receive what hands that are. You've got to open up even a little bit to be able to receive all that love and support. It's around you. Thank you so much for that wisdom. Thank you for everything you've shared today. If somebody's interested in connecting with you, where can they find my website and social media why website has all my social media links and emails, everything is on there. That's probably the best place and that's my first name last name.com or two surveys, calm and flip again, that will be in the show notes as well so people can find you. I really appreciate you being here. And just again, sharing your wisdom giving it to us in a way that we can go like okay, I can actually I can get out of this hole. I can you know there's some things I can start to do. And then it's not as scary as maybe we think it is. But it is impacting our anxiety and our stress everybody. So it's worth addressing to simplify and to be like you said in that space within yourself and just feel love and peace. It's worth the work for sure. So again, thank you for being on the podcast. Thank you so much. It was great. Thank you for having me. I hope you enjoy today's episode. If so take a moment to leave a rating and review. Interested in learning more about my work and the resources I have to support you in the season of your life. Check out the links in the show notes to connect and learn more and as always, here's to finding our balance. Code.